Feature Personal

He’s moved onto someone else: but you can’t hate her

A long term relationship over. Adios.

Two broken hearts, lots of tears and a couple of months have passed.

What’s a couple of months to get over a two and a half year relationship? Apparently, enough time as now he’s with someone new.

You can’t ever hate the new girl because once you were her. Remember? There’s always someone after you and that’s not her fault.

But how shit is it. So, so shit.

They’ll have that honey moon phase where they can’t keep their hands off each other and his family will most likely prefer her – that’s how it always happens, right?

I’m seeing family members comment the same jokes that we shared on your relationship status – do those childhood memories come out for every girlfriend? Of course, they do, I shouldn’t have thought they were only for me. You’re not only for me.

I can’t go mad and throw my shit out the pram because I ended it. I went back and forth but it wasn’t working.

At one point this was a guy I wanted to marry and distance didn’t change that. No, it really didn’t – I can almost imagine the looks on peoples faces reading that.

We made each other laugh until we made each other cry.

Maybe she’ll be able to join in with his favorite quizzes, she won’t wear as much makeup as me and she’ll actually understand politics without needing to read the dumbed down articles first.

So no it didn’t work, and, yes it’s always shit to see someone else fill the void that you never quite filled yourself.

I’m so jealous.

Jealous of that honey moon phase I never wanted to end.

No, I’m not in love anymore. But I’m still in love with a memory and now I’m facing the reality that I’m not that girl anymore.

Featured image: me not giving a fuck.

xoxo

 

26 comments

    1. It’s horrible isn’t it? You can pour your heart out online but then you don’t want the wrong person to read it, or you can talk to friends who have heard it a million times before. It’s so hard, really hope you’re doing okay. If you need to talk feel free to contact me via @elephants_voice (Twitter) as I know it helps to vent for England X

      Like

  1. Aw this really struck a chord with me. I remember feeling this way a few years ago and it’s just so shit. Time truly is a healer and you just have to feel the jealousy and let yourself have your wallowing stage before you can move on. One day you will look back and have less emotion attached to it. For now, focus on you, what you want and what you need from a relationship. Chances are that you probably weren’t going to get your needs met long term in that relationship and the universe has other plans for you 😊 Keep your head up gorgeous!

    Carrie x
    http://www.thelipsticktrail.com

    Liked by 1 person

    1. ‘Time truly is a healer and you just have to feel the jealousy and let yourself have your wallowing stage before you can move on.’ what you’ve said here is truly fantastic, so heartfelt – thanks for such a great reply and taking the time to be so comforting. This is exactly why I grew the balls to share the post – I knew it would resonate with other people who feel or have felt the same.
      So sweet of you and I really appreciate you taking the time doll!

      Luckily I’ve started dating a friend who’s fantastic and has been really understanding.

      Seriously, thank you! xo

      Like

  2. The new one.
    That hurts a bit, but when I was in a situation like this once I tried to keep in mind that he’s happy & she makes him happy and I have to accept it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Depends how it has all been handled really doesn’t it, isn’t always so black and white.
      I appreciate what you’re saying though and can see what you mean, always two sides to a story and all that!
      Thanks for reading Xo

      Like

  3. I’m so sorry to hear this, my last relationship before my current one ended because he cheated on me with my friends ( yes plural) and he ended up dating on of them less than two months later and it was horrible. I felt jealous and upset for months! Always here if you want to chat or need someone to rant to x

    Kayleigh Zara 🌿www.kayleighzaraa.com

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Omg thankfully I’m over the guy I wrote this about now – after a conversation with him I realised he’s happier now so that’s that!
      I once had a guy who cheated on me with my best friend too, I haven’t had a female best friend since as it just fucking sucks.

      I’m so sorry you had to go through that, I know how strongly these things can affect someone and it truly is horrible – I just want to give you a big hug! Xo

      Like

  4. Such an honest post; thank you for sharing! It’s such a relatable topic that, while hard, I’m so glad you decided to share this.
    Sarah x
    saraheliza.co.uk

    Liked by 1 person

  5. It’s so shit I can’t even explain it’s mad and I love how you’ve wrote you’re not in love but in love with a memory. I reached out to my ex like an idiot to find out he’s now seeing someone and that just burned. Emotions are so weird, but you will meet someone who will fulfill your happiness, you’re beautiful and your personality is a 20/10 💖✌🏼

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That is so similar to my own situation – so similar its mad, you have no idea! It burns so bad but sometimes you got to light the flame to see.
      I’m now dating someone new who’s very understanding of me working through these feelings – big plus of dating a long time friend!

      Thanks for the compliment, it’s really appreciated and you’re such a sweet and beautiful ❤️❤️❤️

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you so much lovely message me any time whenever you just want to talk, you’ve been great support and your posts are so amazing you make posts that people can definitely relate to 💖

        Liked by 1 person

  6. I’ve been there. Multiple times. I might be there in the near future too. It really is the worst feeling. Emotions suck but feelings don’t last forever and you’ve gotta remember you can always move on in time and meet more people.

    Faye Jessica | fayejessica.co.uk

    Like

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